It assaulted my ears from another room: a rapid-fire series of irritating voices all repeating the same line, over and over. I couldn’t make out the words, but I knew what it was: another stupid TV commercial.
“Who in the hell is that?” I called out to my wife.
“It’s Allstate, and it’s terrible.”
I clenched my jaw and shook my head.
Time to write a Cranky review.
“Safe drivers save 40 percent!”
The ad, titled “Burger Joint,” opens with long-time Allstate spokesman Dennis Haysbert stepping up to place his order at a restaurant.
“Hey, can I –” he starts, before the guy at the counter cuts him off.
“Hold on just one second,” says Counter Guy distractedly.
Then he looks up and realizes it’s Haysbert, Mr. Allstate himself.
“O-kay!” he says. Then, breathlessly, “Safe drivers save 40 percent!”
This sets off a ricochet of idiocy as now everyone in the ad begins babbling about how safe drivers save 40 percent. From the counter man to a cook, back to the counter and to a second cook, then out to a couple of diners who add their own flourishes at the speed of hyper-stupid.
“That’s safe drivers save 40 percent.”
“It is, that’s safe drivers save 40 percent.”
“He’s right there!”
“It’s him. He’s here.”
“He’s right here.”
And yes, ladies and gentlemen, it’s every bit as obnoxious as it sounds.
Below: Allstate’s 30-second ear-ritant, titled “Burger Joint.”
Did you just say safe drivers save 40 percent?
I have to ask, Allstate and media agency Starcom, because all I hear when this commercial comes on is:
“Look, I’m annoying!”
“Look, I’m annoying!”
“LOOK AT ME! HOLY SHIT, AM I ANNOYING!”
I am tired of saying this, but there is more to advertising than getting people’s attention.
Getting people’s attention does no good if all they want to do afterward is kick your obnoxious ass.
What Allstate’s “safe drivers save 40 percent” ad does right
Well, it brings back Dennis Haysbert, the familiar (and usually likable) face of Allstate.
(I feel so relieved about the apparent demise of Mayhem. Apparently, licking Tina Fey was the one accident he couldn’t survive.)
But alas, Haysbert takes a back seat in this ad — his calm demeanor and deep baritone voice all but silent amid the chittering of hired dingbats.
To Allstate’s credit, the ad does communicate a coherent selling idea — safe drivers save 40 percent, don’t you know — which is more than I can say for Liberty Mutual’s flaccid “only pay for what you need.”
Hmm. What else does this ad do right? It closes with a call-to-action for viewers to visit Allstate.com or contact a local agent for a quote.
But my favorite thing about this ad is that it ends after 30 seconds, because I couldn’t take a second more.
A brief detour to the desert of dumb ideas
Speaking of terrible Allstate commercials, what’s up with the “cop show” ad in the desert?
From the opening scene it looks like one of Liberty Mutual’s “LiMu Emu and Doug” commercials with its anemic yellow filter and cop show motif.
Dennis Haysbert wears a vaguely yellow-looking overcoat as he stands beside a cop who could pass for Doug’s brother.
And then it turns out they’re filming a scene for a cop show directed by a Tina Fey lookalike, in a setup which reminds me of the Esurance commercials starring Dennis Quaid.
Hey, Allstate, is your own advertising agency so bereft of ideas that the best they can do is borrow from other car insurance companies? Don’t you think that making your ads look confusingly like your competitors’ might not be a smart idea?
What on Earth are you trying to do here?
Below: The Allstate TV commercial, “Cop Show.”
What Allstate’s “safe drivers save 40 percent” ad gets wrong
As I have said again and again on this blog, there is more to advertising than getting people’s attention.
Being likable is another important part of the job.
But Allstate’s “Burger Joint” commercial is not likable.
It’s not cute or clever or funny.
What it is is abrasive and contemptible trash created by talent-starved hacks for the sole purpose of artlessly bludgeoning TV viewers with a USP.
Yeah, the ad communicates Allstate’s message. But it’s bad manners to barge into someone’s home and behave like an ass. This is not how you make friends or influence people — or sell products and services.
I suspect this commercial has made many more people change channels than change insurance companies, and that’s the exact opposite of what advertising is supposed to do.
Allstate’s “safe drivers save 40 percent”: The Cranky Ad Review verdict
For being annoying, divisive, derivative, and disrespectful to its audience, The Cranky Creative hereby awards this ad zero stars.
Advertisers, you can do better. As your mostly captive audience, we deserve better.
Let me put this in a way you ad people will understand:
“Unwatchable ads get zero stars!”
“Unwatchable ads get zero stars!”
“Unwatchable ads get zero stars!”
Cranky Ad Review Rating: Zero stars out of five.
What do you think? Is Allstate’s “safe drivers save 40 percent” ad the most irritating commercial on TV? Share your thoughts below.
See all Cranky ad reviews | Go back to blog home page
I have found my tribe
Welcome, LC. We’re glad to have you!
The J. G. Wentworth ad has infuriated me since it began several years ago. I mean, I like opera, but this is intolerable. I can’t smash the mute button quickly enough. Advertisers think repetition is the key to success, no matter how asinine or annoying their ads are. The “wet teddy bear” ad from Liberty Mutual is DUMB and dumb doesn’t equal funny. It was unfunny the first time I saw it and it hasn’t improved with age.
Ditto, James. Liberty Mutual’s teddy bear schtick is beyond awful. Just when I think their ads can’t get worse, they trot out that crap.
State Farm is creeping up in the irritation rankings. I’m more embarrassed for–rather than irritated by–Chris Paul and Aaron Rodgers.
Allstate Insurance with the late French singer Édith Piaf’s hit single Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien. The woman is ‘singing’ if you can call it singing…through her nose in French while we see items left on the tops of cars. I scramble to change the channel or mute the sound! So freaking annoying I’d change my insurance IF I had it with Allstate!
Oh, Marion. Say it ain’t so!
I think that commercial is great. It’s creative, it’s entertaining, and it all pays off with a compelling selling message at the end. I understand that the music may not be to everyone’s taste, but you have to admit, it does add to the quirky humor.
Hey, at least there’s no bloody screaming.
Here’s the ad for those who haven’t seen it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bdLxM_5_bXo
April 5 edit: And here is my review.
Thanks for writing, Marion!
I’m with Marion on this one–and for once, I disagree with you, Rob.
The song is irritating, but that may simply be a function of an over-played commercial. And I fail to see how otherwise negligent folks who leave crap on top of their cars (whether the crap falls off or not) are somehow “safe drivers.”
True story. I was sitting in my car in my office parking lot about 90 minutes ago, waiting for an older gentleman to move his vehicle out of the way so I could back out. As he slowly tried to do a Y-turn for whatever reason, he hit my car. Again, he was driving slowly and ostensibly carefully–but hit me anyway.
So the fact that the damn fish didn’t fall off the car doesn’t equate to a safe choice or safe driving.
Thanks and adieu from the overanalyzing department.
I get you, Joe. Advertising has an objective purpose — to build awareness and goodwill and sell the product. But all of the elements that surround that purpose — the creative idea, the music, the writing, the voice acting — it’s all subjective. So I respect your right to not like this ad.
Especially in light of today’s unfortunate fender-bender. I’m sorry to hear of it, and I hope the damage was minimal. Car accidents (even small ones) are the worst!
Here’s hoping your insurance company — whoever it is — takes good care of you. And thanks for writing, Joe! Always enjoy your comments.
I’m about to lose my cookies with the perfectly-coifed guy who drives perhaps a mile total–on a beautiful day on a quaint little island–to purchase eggs and fish. After he drives home, he checks his phone to see how much $ he saved on premiums for safe driving….
Here’s an idea, Einstein. Walk. You’ll save even more.
Perhaps my kids are right. I’m just not cut out for the 21st century.
I’m with you, Joe. For the life of me, I can never remember the company or product this ad is supposed to sell.
I remember the scenery, I remember the “story.” I even like the look and feel. But I’ll be damned if I can recall the key information this advertiser spent so much money to convey.
It’s what happens when the advertising people who make the ads wish they were artists or movie makers instead.
My daughter hated this post so much she made me stop reading it aloud.
I hope you mean she hated the ad, Jose! Maybe you should read it to her again, just for fun. 😛
There currently are SO MANY annoying commercials! I believe I lose millions of brain cells everytime I see an ad with the Experian boost purple cow, any ad with Limu Emu and Doug, the Geico gecko, Flo and her idiot sidekicks, Zoltar and the list goes on. And, do you see the theme here–they are all insurance company ads (except Experian)! Come on, quit insulting our intelligence with this idiocy! The only really good ad I’ve seen recently is from American Family Insurance with the toy car racing around to the tune of You Make My Dreams Come True.
Agreed, tho’ I would add the American Family ad to the scrap heap as well. Truth be told, Hall and Oates is/are an insult to my eardrums (but that’s a different issue).
Am Fam has been trotting out this “we insure your dreams” crap for years. When we had hail damage to our roof a few years back, the Am Fam adjuster was not some warm fuzzy. He was a callous a-hole who didn’t give a flying shit about anything but cutting the smallest claim check possible.
And now they have the naming rights to Miller Park. Ugh…
Good point, Anonymous — the worst ads on television are from insurance companies. Somewhere along the line, someone had an idea, whether it was the GEICO gecko or the AFLAC duck. But just like a game of telephone, the idea and the message got lost a little bit with every new company that followed along.
Now all we have is one big cacophony of stupid, with each advertiser doing its best to out-stupid the others.
Good on American Family Insurance for breaking from the pack and doing something different.
The Burger Joint ad is supposed to instruct us in the virtue of patience in the face of adversity as a subliminal take away….and hammer us to death with the message. Why must there always be a dopey dork like androgynous Jamie….in this case the putz at the table? Interestingly our empathy is attempted to be gained in the opening….who among us has not been annoyed by a service person on their phone when at a counter (in this case the counter guy is scribbling, perhaps an order)? Then we are supposed to emulate the Zen of Allstate Man, surrounded as we all are by a sea of annoying bullshit, and Keep Calm, Carry On, and absorb the message. Absolutely awful stuff.
In contrast….a repetitive format ad that works…”Call JG Wentworth, 877 CASH NOW”. I think that is a great ad in every respect….the bus one. You will never forget that number! (Who are those people…Metropolitan Opera cast for Siegfried?). So there you have an example, in Steve Martin’s words, of the difference between S#@t and Shinola.
Hi, Cap’n! As always, I appreciate the comedy of your in-depth analysis. But I watched that J.G. Wentworth ad, and hoo-boy. I don’t know. I think I’d jump on the mute button for this one, too.
Anyone care to chime in?
Amen on both Allstate ads, which approach the sheer idiocy of those of Liberty Mutual. State Farm is a close third with Jake, who has the personality of stump.
I seem to recall it was Haysbert sitting in a chair in the middle of a busy intersection, making snide observations about folks’ safety choices….
I always get a chuckle out of the “becoming your parents” ads (likely hit home a bit), tho’ it takes me a spell to recall what’s being advertised. Clever to the point that the message is buried.
Hey, Joe! See, I didn’t mind the Allstate ad with Haysbert sitting in the middle of a busy intersection. At least it sounded good thanks to the actor’s calm and composed delivery. And although the soundtrack was sprinkled with car horns and squealing brakes, it was altogether more listenable than the cacophonous “safe drivers save 40 percent” debacle the company is running now.
And yes, I too think the “becoming your parents” ads work well. They’re entertaining without being obnoxious — which is rare these days.
Oh, and Jake from Allstate? I actually liked those ads before the Diversity Police changed Jake from a white guy to black. Hey, I’m all for representation, but simply changing the race of an already-established character feels like pandering to me. The company should have given the new guy a different name so they could alternate characters from ad to ad.
Thanks for writing, Joe. Good to hear from you!