A lot has happened since 2018: I left in-house and agency marketing to start my own freelance copywriting business; I found success and satisfaction working directly with clients (and not being undermined or outright sabotaged by my so-called colleagues); and most recently, I quit this silly and oftentimes shady industry to start a new career. Oh, and I also started a little blog called The Cranky Creative that’s been helping creatives and taking the industry to task while shining a light on truths few others dare to discuss.
Speaking of truths few dare to discuss, I’d like to start by sharing one of the most disappointing things I’ve learned in my five years of blogging here at The Cranky Creative:
Creative professionals are, by and large, a bunch of wimps.
I mean, I’ve had my suspicions all these years working with copywriters and graphic designers who wouldn’t say boo when management screwed them, or allowed clients to screw them. In my 30+ years in marketing and advertising, I can count on one hand my fellow creatives who had the courage to stand up and speak out for themselves and their colleagues when their voices were needed.
I guess it’s easier to just “go along to get along” and keep your head down so you can be left alone to “be creative” and perfect that flashy new graphics technique you’ll try to sell the next six clients on using.
But I believe this reticence on the part of creatives is the reason so many creative departments are so dysfunctional and ineffective, and why so many creatives are so much less happy in their jobs than they could be.
I believe it’s also why most of the engagement this blog receives from creative professionals appears to be from former creatives who left the industry after deciding they’d had enough of the sleazy tactics, sycophancy, and phony-baloney nonsense that pervades so many brands and agencies.
Folks, you can’t fix what’s broke until you get up the nerve to talk about it. And no, I don’t mean grousing among yourselves.
That’s the truth, and it’s why I started this blog.
Of course, this weakness of workplace character is not unique to marketing and advertising. Oh, no. The corporate world’s ongoing obsession with political correctness and workplace niceness culture has put a steely squeeze on the windpipe of rational discourse, squelching healthy debate and constructive criticism and labeling as “negative” anyone who dares to voice an opinion that goes against the grain.
I really cannot wait for the adults to come back into the room to remind everyone that conflict is a natural and necessary part of a healthy workplace — but friends, I am not holding my breath.
In the meantime, I’d like to thank all of my faithful readers and everyone who visits this blog, including the apparently massive contingent of consumers who have an interest in — or, more accurately, a terrible, nagging aversion to — today’s advertising.
With that said, let’s take a look back at some of the best, most popular, and most important Cranky blog posts of the past five years.
The best of the best of The Cranky Creative blog so far
Are TV commercials becoming more annoying? Yes, yes they are. Here are 10 reasons why. If only the people who make the ads would take this list to heart, clients might actually get their money’s worth and we’d all be less cranky.
Did you know that banking elites (including, and especially, Larry Fink of BlackRock) are responsible for so much of the woke bullshit that dominates today’s advertising? Yeah. Brands like Bud Light aren’t destroying themselves out of the goodness of their hearts — their top executives are being paid big bucks by the country’s top investment firms to push the approved agendas.
Artificial intelligence (AI) is here and it’s more advanced than you think. Today, there are dozens of AI programs that specialize in writing marketing copy, designing logos, creating graphic designs, generating images, coding web pages, composing music, making movies, and so much more. No wonder some experts expect AI to replace 80 percent of jobs (not just marketing jobs) “in the next few years.”
By far the most popular article on the blog, this post dares to ask why black people (12 percent of the U.S. population) are given so much representation in TV commercials while whites are a shrinking minority.
Before we discovered who was behind it, some of us wondered why so many brands seemed so eager to sacrifice their reputations and existing customer bases in pursuit of “modern, progressive audiences.” This post draws an interesting parallel between the self-destructive efforts of consumer brands and Hollywood movie studios that are hell-bent on burning down their own beloved franchises.
Do consumers really care where brands stand on social issues? According to a study by Reach, a brand’s particular stance (if any) seems to have very little bearing on consumers’ buying decisions. (That is, with the exception of some pretty high-profile disasters.)
No, consumers don’t care about your brand’s stand on social issues
Ahead of the curve once again, The Cranky Creative calls out the slow-motion collapse of quality and competenence that’s blighting our post-COVID world.
On a lighter note, this post highlights some of the most unintentionally(?) hilarious brand logos ever designed. How many dick jokes can you spot?
The corporate world runs on business jargon — bullshitty buzzwords that mask the meaning of the things we want to say. Here, I share the white-collar words and phrases that most drive me nuts.
This next post features a curated collection of my favorite quotes from legendary ad men David Ogilvy, Leo Burnett, William “Bill” Bernbach, Rosser Reeves, and Howard Luck Gossage on topics ranging from creativity to clients to advertising theory and the people who create the ads.
Let me tell you how not fun it was researching, writing, and continually updating this blog post about the experimental and unproven COVID shots (no, they are not traditional vaccines) while government, Big Tech, “academia,” and the mainstream news media all banded together to censor, suppress, and destroy anyone who dared to question their safety or efficacy. And they are still doing it now, even as the carnage has touched my own circle of friends, family members and acquaintances in the form of recurring sickness, turbo cancers, shingles (a tell-tale sign of immune system damage) and the sudden deaths of people far too young to die of heart attacks or slip away in their sleep.
(For links to additional studies and published papers, see last year’s anniversary post, “Sad news as The Cranky Creative turns four.”)
Anxiety is the most common mood disorder in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults (18 percent of the population) every year. In this blog post, I share the signs, symptoms, and causes of anxiety; a long list of famous people who suffer with it; and tips and strategies for keeping the darkness at bay.
This post contains a collection of confessions, opinions, and unvarnished random thoughts dating back to my early days as a copywriter.
Unofficially, my career as a marketing copywriter started in 1980 when I was 10. In this post, I share the story of how the glorious early days of video game advertising changed my life forever.
Should you think twice before becoming a copywriter? Yes, absolutely — and that was before the advent of AI.
The old saying isn’t true. In marketing and advertising, the customer (or client) is not always right, and marketing people who pretend otherwise are doing themselves — and their clients — a great disservice.
At least twice in my career, I have worked for companies whose Compliance departments were completely out of control. I wrote this blog post after a particularly bad day that was followed by a surprisingly inspiring conversation with a fellow copywriter.
Marketers, stop letting compliance departments write your sales copy
Too many copywriters simply roll over when clients insist on making petty changes to their work. What these writers don’t realize is that being so “accommodating” undermines their position as professionals and weakens their ability to fight the battles that really matter.
Here, I serve up nine more timeless ideas to help advertisers do their jobs better so their clients will do more business and we all might hate advertising a little less.
This post examines a study conducted by behavioral researcher Dan Ariely that demonstrates how easy it is to motivate workers to be more productive — and why it’s even easier to suck them dry.
Exploring the effects of positive and negative motivation on worker happiness and productivity
Deciding whether or not to quit a job can be excruciating. I wrote this blog post because I could have really used it when I was going through my own painful decision process in the early 2010s.
All right, Dear Reader, now it’s your turn
What’s your favorite Cranky blog post of the past five years? And, are creatives really as wimpy as I think? What other topics would you like this blog to explore? Share your thoughts below — and thank you for reading!
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Get REAL Cranky I want names..of Advertising company execs and the producers, writers and directors they employ, backrounds, religion, gender ect.
Now that would be informative!!
Oh, Anonymous, I think I know where you’re going with this. To any Cranky readers who are curious, I suggest you look up the Khazarian Mafia using a search engine such as Brave or Qwant. Big Tech and the Anti-Defamation League will tell you it is an antisemitic conspiracy theory, but you may want to dig deeper and decide for yourself.
A great “greatest hits” package, Rob, plus plenty of new thoughts, We need this blog so much, keep it going (hint hint). I think my favourite post was the hellish Virgin Atlantic post. Thanks to them, I do now “see the world differently”. I see it as somewhere I will never be crossing on a Virgin Atlantic plane.
https://thecrankycreative.com/ad-review-fly-the-freaky-skies-with-virgin-atlantic/
Thank you, Jessica! Ladies and gentlemen, when your new favorite author takes the time to comment on your blog, you know you’ve had a good day.
And I agree with you, that Virgin Atlantic campaign was really something. Do these wokies not realize they’ve reached the point of self-parody? I know they’re deadly serious, but between Virgin Atlantic, the Spanish J&B Whisky ad with the grandfather who puts on makeup to comfort his transgender son, Bud Light’s stock-crashing adventure with Dylan Mulvaney, and so many other examples of virtue-signaling self-immolation, I’m laughing my straight, white male ass right off.
The tide has turned, I am sure. I mean, how often do you hear anyone saying they like this crap? There is a great opportunity for other brands to get in there and produce some great non-pandering ads that speak to the masses.
Oh, I would agree, except I suspect Virgin Atlantic may be run by true believers — or at the very least, a board that can’t get enough of that sweet, sweet ESG money.
Loved the nostalgia tour!
It’s been a ride, hasn’t it? Thanks for taking it with me.
By the way, Cranky readers, Mike here is my friend and fellow copywriter who made my day with his amazing story about his team’s battle with Compliance in my blog post, “Marketers, stop letting compliance departments write your sales copy.”
https://thecrankycreative.com/marketers-stop-letting-compliance-departments-write-sales-copy/
Here, here!
Thanks, spwilcen, and thank you for reading!
When not grousing amongst ourselves, it pays to keep up with other “cranks” to see if we missed a lick. And to reload with ideas and snappy comebacks for when we do go to confront [with admirable intentions: to proselytize] Wokers, et.al. to carry on the fight against banality, inanity, and insanity.
Indeed, spwilcen. I do enjoy hob-nobbing with fellow cranks, which is one of the reasons I’ve been reading your blog as well.
Why, I’m proud to hear that. Thankee.
One thing I’ve noticed is all the traditional male roles are being taken over by women. Ads for gyms, kickboxing classes, fitness boot camp, etc. show females predominantly if not exclusively. Even where I live there is a huge billboard for a pest control company showing a woman exterminator (which ironically is symbolic of how advertising is exterminating the male of the species). It seems women want to keep their roles as nurturer (child custody is still pro-mother) while also supplanting males as provider, protector, etc. advertising shows then taking over the boardroom and now blue collar jobs as well. One thing I can guarantee is once they’re the predominant money makers, suddenly spousal support will miraculously disappear. Much like we are.
Oh, yes, Anonymous. “The future is female,” as the T-shirts say. But seriously, the “strong female character” trope has been with us for a good many years now, and it’s pretty played out. See: any Star Wars movie of the past several years, any recent or upcoming Disney film, the Barbie movie, a whole host of crappy TV shows, and, of course, advertising.
Looking around our society today, one might be forgiven for thinking that someone is waging a war on men (especially white men).
Was Freud right? Is penis envy real? Do women really want to be men? Or are women their own perfect, unique and beautiful beings and in fact it is the agitators, instigators, and provocateurs in government, education, and entertainment who are hellbent on smashing traditional gender roles — ostensibly to promote women, but with the actual result of confusing people of both sexes and sowing division, dissent, and disharmony?
I think we both know the answer to that.
Thanks for your comment. As a bonus, here’s a video on “The Strong Female Character” from The Critical Drinker that I think you might enjoy: